A SIGN IN A SHOE REPAIR STORE IN VANCOUVER READ:
We will heel you
We will save your sole
We will even dye for you.
A SIGN ON A BLINDS AND CURTAIN TRUCK:
Blind man driving.
Sign over a Gynecologist’s Office:
“Dr. Jones, at your cervix.
In a Podiatrist’s office:
“Time wounds all heels.
On a Septic Tank Truck:
Yesterday’s Meals on Wheels
At an Optometrist’s Office:
“If you don’t see what you’re looking for, you’ve come to the right place.
On a Plumber’s truck:
“We repair what your husband fixed.
On another Plumber’s truck:
“Don’t sleep with a drip. Call your plumber.
On an Electrician’s truck:
“Let us remove your shorts.
In a Non-smoking Area:
“If we see smoke, we will assume you are on fire and will take appropriate action.
On a Maternity Room door:
“Push! Push! Push!
At a Car Dealership:
“The best way to get back on your feet – miss a car payment.
Outside a Muffler Shop:
“No appointment necessary. We hear you coming.
In a Veterinarian’s waiting room:
“Be back in 5 minutes. Sit! Stay!
At the Electric Company:
“We would be delighted if you send in your payment on time. However, if you don’t, YOU will be de-lighted.
In a Restaurant window:
“Don’t stand there and be hungry; come on in and get fed up.
In the front yard of a Funeral Home:
“Drive carefully. We’ll wait.
At a Propane Filling Station:
“Thank Heaven for little grills.
In a Chicago Radiator Shop:
“Best place in town to take a leak.
And the best one for last
Sign on the back of another Septic Tank Truck:
“Caution – This Truck is full of Political Promises”